Tag Archives: retirement

More Sparkle!

Posted on January 30, 2010 by | Comments Off on More Sparkle!
When I was thinking about retiring, I was worried that my general exhaustion would make me nearly comatose without a job to go to. I got good advice from my dear friend Margaret who told me that when you make the changes your life needs, you are filled with new energy. I was skeptical, but had no evidence to the contrary. I wondered what would happen when I finally left the career I had loved for 35 years, but which had left me in a rut.

Margaret, you were right! Such interesting changes have happened. With no effort, my blood pressure is down to a very healthy range, some other annoying stress related physical symptoms have improved. This is so interesting, that stress has such an impact on us and can come for a variety of reasons. In my case, it was time to make a change and the stress of not doing so was intense. That's how I understand my need to leave my job. Yes, there were conditions in the workplace that really stressed me out, but not everyone felt it as strongly as I did. It was time for a change. And changes there have been.

I love the feeling of having the time to think and reflect, to read as long as I want to. My short term memory has improved (because of less junk cluttering up my mind's attic?) and I am really enjoying picking a variety of books to read. When I became a college professor, I imagined myself sitting in my office in a comfy chair sipping tea and reading. Occasionally a student would stop by for a discussion of some cool topic. Then I would go back to reading and sipping.

Finally I am able to do that. Heaven, pure heaven. My mind is so happy. And, oddly, I have less tolerance for empty mental noise. I have been a news and information addict since my twenties, but all of a sudden I have little tolerance for the posturing and silliness of most political conversation. The lack of truth gets to me - why spend time discussing something that is based on falsehoods, diversions, and out and out lies? So I have turned the car radio to classical WETA. I will stink at this week's "Wait, Wait, Don't tell me!"

I have been working on cleaning out the basement, ably assisted by my daughter, Anna. I do regard this as metaphorical, clearing out untended parts of my unconscious. I believe that is the theory of Feng Shue, that the condition of your surroundings mirrors (and influences) the condition of your mind. And, to my distress, one of my favorite earrings disappeared into the clean up. We went through the trash bags (using the newly uncovered latex gloves) and the boxes for charity, to no avail. I did a search of the areas I had worked in, floor, shelves, no luck. I was pretty cranky about this. Grumble, grumble. (Who said work on the unconscious is easy?)

The next morning I went back to the basement for another search, and spotted a pile of baskets I had made. Going through them I found the earring, happily nesting between layers. Happy, happy. And then I decided to commit to more sparkle. I wear silver, which gets tarnished. Why not stop and polish those favorite earrings before I put them on? Why not take the time to bring more shine and glitz to my life? It's working this week, anyway.

Here's to more sparkle!

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More Sparkle!

Posted on January 30, 2010 by | Comments Off on More Sparkle!
When I was thinking about retiring, I was worried that my general exhaustion would make me nearly comatose without a job to go to. I got good advice from my dear friend Margaret who told me that when you make the changes your life needs, you are filled with new energy. I was skeptical, but had no evidence to the contrary. I wondered what would happen when I finally left the career I had loved for 35 years, but which had left me in a rut.

Margaret, you were right! Such interesting changes have happened. With no effort, my blood pressure is down to a very healthy range, some other annoying stress related physical symptoms have improved. This is so interesting, that stress has such an impact on us and can come for a variety of reasons. In my case, it was time to make a change and the stress of not doing so was intense. That's how I understand my need to leave my job. Yes, there were conditions in the workplace that really stressed me out, but not everyone felt it as strongly as I did. It was time for a change. And changes there have been.

I love the feeling of having the time to think and reflect, to read as long as I want to. My short term memory has improved (because of less junk cluttering up my mind's attic?) and I am really enjoying picking a variety of books to read. When I became a college professor, I imagined myself sitting in my office in a comfy chair sipping tea and reading. Occasionally a student would stop by for a discussion of some cool topic. Then I would go back to reading and sipping.

Finally I am able to do that. Heaven, pure heaven. My mind is so happy. And, oddly, I have less tolerance for empty mental noise. I have been a news and information addict since my twenties, but all of a sudden I have little tolerance for the posturing and silliness of most political conversation. The lack of truth gets to me - why spend time discussing something that is based on falsehoods, diversions, and out and out lies? So I have turned the car radio to classical WETA. I will stink at this week's "Wait, Wait, Don't tell me!"

I have been working on cleaning out the basement, ably assisted by my daughter, Anna. I do regard this as metaphorical, clearing out untended parts of my unconscious. I believe that is the theory of Feng Shue, that the condition of your surroundings mirrors (and influences) the condition of your mind. And, to my distress, one of my favorite earrings disappeared into the clean up. We went through the trash bags (using the newly uncovered latex gloves) and the boxes for charity, to no avail. I did a search of the areas I had worked in, floor, shelves, no luck. I was pretty cranky about this. Grumble, grumble. (Who said work on the unconscious is easy?)

The next morning I went back to the basement for another search, and spotted a pile of baskets I had made. Going through them I found the earring, happily nesting between layers. Happy, happy. And then I decided to commit to more sparkle. I wear silver, which gets tarnished. Why not stop and polish those favorite earrings before I put them on? Why not take the time to bring more shine and glitz to my life? It's working this week, anyway.

Here's to more sparkle!

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Mending

Posted on January 10, 2010 by | Comments Off on Mending
Cold outside, beautiful light streaming in the windows onto my bead table/sewing table. It's a lovely old thing with a wooden top and cast iron legs. It used to be a two person desk in a schoolroom. It has old carved and written words on it, and glue I've spilled on it, and my grandmother's pincushion, and a complicated mess of beads and potential projects and needles for almost any kind of beading or sewing project you can think of. Yesterday I sat down in this lovely spot to work on some mending.

Mending is very satisfying work for me. You take something that is basically good that needs some small (or large) repair and make it usable again. Yesterday I worked on my daughter's jeans (third time for this - I am now to the point of patching patches, but they are still going strong), a pocket area rip in my husband's suit pants, the hem on a bathmat I can't bear to part with, some socks with cats on them, some reusable grocery bags that just had little rips that I didn't want to see get bigger, and my old brown backpack that I bought in 1979 when I gave up my car and decided to carry everything myself.

The backpack used to have a label that said "Dolt" on it, which I thought was funny. Nice archaic word that as a teacher I thought I should endeavor to transcend, as in "I may be a dolt but I work hard to overcome it." With the hidden message, "and you can, too." And we are all dolts at some things. The backpack became the picnic basket, toy holder and diaper bag when the kids were young. It went on many adventures. And now, with its newly repaired seam and some trimming where the fiber was unraveling inside the bag, it is ready for more. Maybe a farewell visit to Tai Shan, the born in DC Zoo panda who is now 4 and who has to return to China soon.

Mending things is something I've done all my life. Now it seems either quaint (who knows how to hand sew now?) or incredibly hip (the green alternative to buying new stuff.) It can lead to a basement full of things to be repaired, but it can also reinforce the "use it up, wear it out, make do or do without" attitude, which requires a lot of "make do" to be successful.

Having had enough money to have some flexible funds for playing (buying yarn, music equipment, lunches out) I am now in the position of having to be more conservative with my spending. I don't anticipate it being difficult since I've lived on very little at various times in my life, and I'm confident that I can do it again. But being able to mend things should help the process. How wonderful to have the time to do it!

Of course, I am also mending myself. With age, you have to do more maintenance that you do when you are young. And working in a highly stressful environment, especially the last 3 1/2 years, was taking its toll. It made sense to stay working long enough to retire, but there were costs. The good news is that I am sleeping better than I have in years, and some other annoying health things are getting attention and improving.

If I apply "use it up, wear it out, make do, or do without" to myself, I guess I am working on the first three objectives. I want to use up every last bit of life experience that I can. When I am worn out, I will make do (for more experience, and hopefully more learning in the process). And when the time comes, I will let go of this life and "do without". I am not going to surrender to inertia and start dying while I am still alive. But anyone who knows me can tell you that - I'm pretty engaged in whatever comes along.

Right now, I am mending.

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Mending

Posted on January 10, 2010 by | Comments Off on Mending
Cold outside, beautiful light streaming in the windows onto my bead table/sewing table. It's a lovely old thing with a wooden top and cast iron legs. It used to be a two person desk in a schoolroom. It has old carved and written words on it, and glue I've spilled on it, and my grandmother's pincushion, and a complicated mess of beads and potential projects and needles for almost any kind of beading or sewing project you can think of. Yesterday I sat down in this lovely spot to work on some mending.

Mending is very satisfying work for me. You take something that is basically good that needs some small (or large) repair and make it usable again. Yesterday I worked on my daughter's jeans (third time for this - I am now to the point of patching patches, but they are still going strong), a pocket area rip in my husband's suit pants, the hem on a bathmat I can't bear to part with, some socks with cats on them, some reusable grocery bags that just had little rips that I didn't want to see get bigger, and my old brown backpack that I bought in 1979 when I gave up my car and decided to carry everything myself.

The backpack used to have a label that said "Dolt" on it, which I thought was funny. Nice archaic word that as a teacher I thought I should endeavor to transcend, as in "I may be a dolt but I work hard to overcome it." With the hidden message, "and you can, too." And we are all dolts at some things. The backpack became the picnic basket, toy holder and diaper bag when the kids were young. It went on many adventures. And now, with its newly repaired seam and some trimming where the fiber was unraveling inside the bag, it is ready for more. Maybe a farewell visit to Tai Shan, the born in DC Zoo panda who is now 4 and who has to return to China soon.

Mending things is something I've done all my life. Now it seems either quaint (who knows how to hand sew now?) or incredibly hip (the green alternative to buying new stuff.) It can lead to a basement full of things to be repaired, but it can also reinforce the "use it up, wear it out, make do or do without" attitude, which requires a lot of "make do" to be successful.

Having had enough money to have some flexible funds for playing (buying yarn, music equipment, lunches out) I am now in the position of having to be more conservative with my spending. I don't anticipate it being difficult since I've lived on very little at various times in my life, and I'm confident that I can do it again. But being able to mend things should help the process. How wonderful to have the time to do it!

Of course, I am also mending myself. With age, you have to do more maintenance that you do when you are young. And working in a highly stressful environment, especially the last 3 1/2 years, was taking its toll. It made sense to stay working long enough to retire, but there were costs. The good news is that I am sleeping better than I have in years, and some other annoying health things are getting attention and improving.

If I apply "use it up, wear it out, make do, or do without" to myself, I guess I am working on the first three objectives. I want to use up every last bit of life experience that I can. When I am worn out, I will make do (for more experience, and hopefully more learning in the process). And when the time comes, I will let go of this life and "do without". I am not going to surrender to inertia and start dying while I am still alive. But anyone who knows me can tell you that - I'm pretty engaged in whatever comes along.

Right now, I am mending.

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The last day

Posted on December 12, 2009 by | Comments Off on The last day
How do you say goodbye to a profession you have loved for 36 years? That's how long I have been teaching college courses in the study of religion and philosophy. And now it was time to say goodbye. I was worried it would be anticlimactic, or one of those days when the students were stressed and ornery, or I would cry in front of everyone. I've pretty much said what I had to say to my students, though every semester I wake up a week later and say, "Oh, but I forgot to talk about ..." something or other that I thought it was vital to discuss. (I'm handling that problem by my new blog "Dangling Conversation" that will be a place for former and future students to talk things over.)

So, to manage the last day of teaching, I gave a test in philosophy class and had a special event planned for religion and society. One of my favorite courses through the years was "Native American Religion and Culture" which was created out of student demand and interest. I learned a lot about the cultures of the 500 native nations that were here on Turtle Island (North America) at the time of contact. One thing I learned about I wanted to do on this day.

In many native nations, when it is time to celebrate a change in your life, you have a giveaway. I had much to give away in gratitude for many great years of teaching and learning at Gallaudet University. And, I'm kind of a pack rat (please don't alert the Clean House people) so I had collected lots of craft supplies and toys and stuff they give away at information tables. And earrings I don't wear any more and office decorations that it's time to move to a new home. So I brought in a large basket full of gifts, and each student was able to choose a few.

Then we had a talking circle with a feather I had added rainbow seed beads to years ago. (Just to alert those who are worried about such things, it was a genuine imitation eagle feather, originally grown on a domestic turkey and painted to look like a bald eagle tail feather.) We passed the feather around the circle and each spoke. The rules are that the person with the feather gets to speak, and no one else interrupts. If you don't want to speak you can pass the feather to the next person. We talked about what we want to let go of and what we want to include in our lives in the next year.

I said that I wanted to let go of stress and embrace creativity. Simple, right? Well, we shall see. But I did sleep extraordinarily well last night. The class ended beautifully with us thanking each other for a good semester and hopes for continued learning for all of us. I did tear up a little, but I don't think anyone noticed.

You should know that I have had a unique job teaching religion and philosophy in sign language at Gallaudet University. For many years, I was the only person in the world with that position, though now there are others on campus taking the torch for the next leg of the run. My students are all deaf and hard of hearing, with the occasional hearing student thrown in to make it interesting. Everyone communicates in sign language in the classroom and on campus. I guess I have to say my students were all deaf and hard of hearing. I am retiring, after all.

Next week I finish grading (the hardest part of being a professor) and cleaning out my office, and my friends are having a party to say goodbye to me. Not that I'm going anywhere. I'm right here, getting ready for whatever is next!

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A New Path

Posted on December 1, 2009 by | Comments Off on A New Path


It's December 1st, and I'm officially retired! My last day was supposed to be last Friday, but they closed the office so my actual last work day was Wednesday. It's still all a bit odd in my mind. I've had to make a little index card reminder system so I actually know what day of the week it is. There's been a lot of sorting and tossing going on. I find it hard to just sit and play until the work is done, even if I'm not sure what the work is supposed to be. And nope, I haven't hit the basement yet. But some will have to be done soon so I can get to the Christmas decorations.



I was blessed with the corporate party and it was great fun. I only have a couple of pics..I never seem to remember to take them but there are more in a throwaway camera that I've yet to drop off for developing. The banner almost made me cry. One of my most beloved young patients nicknamed me Rambo and it traveled throughout my community. I still here "Hey Rambo!" from time to time when I'm out and about. I still miss ya Jarred!



I received some a lot of super cards and lovely gifts. I'm well stocked for the time being on soaky bath stuff (and the time to really soak!) and books and candles and gift cards to Bath and Body Works and Hastings and Barnes and Noble. Oh and two soft throws and softie socks! These folks really know me! One of my coworkers presented me with a little album of candid shots of all my coworkers which I treasure.

So now it's a new path. I don't know where it's gonna take me. My mental backpack is filled with enthusiasm and curiosity and I'll have to send you postcards along the way! It's gonna be a real trip!

ETA: My friend Jackie just called from the office. In a sing-song voice she said "It's end of the month and you aren't here!" Now that's one thing I won't miss! :-)

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